~Manda's Thoughts~

young death

Last week my aunt on my dads side of the family passed away.
Tammy Jo Arnold.
She was really the only person on the Arnold side of the family that liked to try and keep the family together and keep in touch and all that. Im not sure what it is about the "Arnolds" but we aren't the BEST at keeping in touch with one another. Her daughter Gina was really the only one that i talked to for a long time. But things have changed and we have been trying to keep in touch more with her and my dad.
Tammy passed away wednesday night in her sleep. at least she got to go in the way that MOST all of us wish to go, she was only 45 though. Hep C and diabetes got the best of her, but her memory will go on. i pray for strength for her family... especially those closest to her (i.e. Husband and kids, her grandson Aaron and her youngest son dustin, and that poor lady at the viewing/wake who couldn't stop crying) im not sure who she was but the poor woman was bawling her eyes out. :( very sad.

So my mom and i went to the veiwing/wake friday, my mom grew up with 50% of the people there, my grandma actually babysat my mom, aunt and uncle back in the day. It's crazy, going YEARS without seeing some of these people and then having to "catch up" at a funeral or viewing. My mom told someone "we have to stop getting together like this" My grandma arnold actually said "isn't it sad the only time we talk is funerals or weddings?" and "look at all of us living right on top of each other and we never seen each other!" my grandma, my mom and me all live about 7 minutes TOPS from each other, and we NEVER see each other. (i mean i see my mom and she sees me lol but you know what i mean.) CRAZY? i dunno but is it MY fault? NOPE! lol my mom came out of the veiwing/wake and was like "god, i feel so bad that i never see any of those people anymore".... for those who don't know my mother - she is EASILY made to feel bad, she is always feeling guilty for something or the other but i told her that VISITING / keeping in touch, is a two way street. ALL of those people that you are feeling bad that you never see, NEVER SEE YOU! maybe they feel bad about it too, but not bad enough to do something so CRAZY as come visit YOU! so screw that guilty shit.. maybe im sounding mean right now (for the Arnolds reading this) but it does work two ways ;)
i have learned that i sometimes put myself "out there" more often than other people are likely to do for me, because LIKE my mom i have that "i feel guilty" gene. but i am quickly getting over that because family or not.... if you aint making an effort to see me or talk to me or keep in touch with ME...
WHY SHOULD I WITH YOU!?!?!?!
i mean more than likely im gonna make some kind of an effort to keep in touch but after i have made an effort and there is still no effort on your part... that's about the time im gonna just give up and not think twice about it.

is that bad????

on a brighter note. we went out this weekend (our saturday lunch) for my cuz's bday- ya'll know me, i'll have pics soon! :) but we went to the cheesecake factory for her bday and it kinda sucked.. for the prices! but we had fun anyway, took all kinds of pics and found that i HATE my camera but i love my moms! LOL only about a 200 dollar difference in the prices too. but anywho it was only my mom, aunt, lil brother and cousin but we always act DONKEY while were out so it was fun. Poor little hunter prolly can't wait till he is old enough to not have to go with us "hens" lol we go every saturday that we all have available to eat lunch together. it's usually at the china garden which is FAB but we went there for something different cause none of us had ever been.

josh and deena came out last night for dinner and canasta... i FREAKIN love this game. me, robyn, mark and josh j. use to play it all the time back in the day and we'd have cards EVERYWHERE!!! it was soo much fun! but deena brought it up the other day and i was like OMG i love this game.. we need to PLAY right now! lol so we did. me and mark kicked deena and josh's ASS! hee hee TWICE!

well i better go it's almost lunch time now - my hunny is coming to get me for lunch today! ;) he luvs me. i can tell! hee hee

posted by ~Manda @ 9:43 AM